[Access] Response to "Make it a Shay Day"

[David Gilmartin]

I wanted to check this one out on Urban Legends. Here's a bit more  
information, and commentary.

The story quoted . . . is "Perfection at the Plate," a work of Rabbi  
Paysach Krohn which appeared in his 1999 book, Echoes of the Maggid.  
Echoes is a "Chicken Soup for the Soul" type work, described by its  
publishers as "heartwarming stories and parables of wisdom and  
inspiration." It is the fifth such tome in the Maggid series. Rabbi  
Krohn says that the story is true and that he was told it by Shay's  
[in the book, Shaya's] father, who is a friend of his . . .

The true value of any inspirational tale lies not in its veracity (or  
lack thereof) but in its ability to move those who read it to improve  
some facet of themselves. As with many other glurges, we find this  
story's premise a poor one, and its message one likely to do more harm  
than good.

What to make of an incitement to bestow upon the disabled a pat on the  
head instead of granting them acceptance for who they are, even when  
that means accepting the limitations placed upon them by their  
infirmities?

The story of Shaya's grand slam positions the 18 boys who fooled the  
disabled child into thinking he'd done something miraculous as great- 
hearted lads who reached into the depths of their souls and therein  
found the kindness with which to lavish upon a less-abled youngster.  
We're supposed to look up to them and want to be like them. Yet to do  
that, we'd have to fail to understand the nature of what they did --  
rather than accept Shaya for who he was, they pretended he wasn't  
disabled. Were this story taken as the model for how we should all  
behave around the less-abled, those struggling with very real physical  
and mental shortcomings would never get to show off what they can do  
nor experience the honest praise of admiring teammates and co-workers  
for their actual contributions, because pity-driven exercises in make- 
believe would rob them of their every chance to be seen as actual  
people.

Can a disabled child hit a baseball as well as a perfectly-abled one?  
No. But can that same child learn to work within his disabilities to  
the point of achieving real accomplishments he can take honest pride  
in? Absolutely. And that beats all the pity-driven home runs in the  
world.

Said the father in the story, "I believe that when God brings a child  
like this into the world the perfection that he seeks is in the way  
people react to this child." This story counsels that "perfection" be  
one of pity and dismissal of the actual person. And that can't be right.

Barbara "killed with kindness" Mikkelson

Message from David Gilmartin



>> Two Choices:
>>
>> What would you do? You make the choice. Don't look for a punch line,
>> there isn't one. Read it anyway. The question is: Would you have
>> made the same choice?
>>
>> At a fund raising dinner for a school that serves learning-disabled
>> children, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that
>> would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the
>> school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: 'When not
>> interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is
>> done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other
>> children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where
>> is the natural order of things in my son?'
>>
>> The audience was stilled by the query.
>>
>> The father continued. 'I believe that when a child like Shay,
>> physically and m entally handicapped comes into the world, an
>> opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it
>> comes in the way other people treat that child.'
>>
>> Then he told the following story:
>>
>> Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew
>> were playing baseball. Shay asked, 'Do you think they'll let me
>> play?' Shay's father knew that most of the boys would not want
>> someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that
>> if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed
>> sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in
>> spite of his handicaps.
>>
>> Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not
>> expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for
>> guidance and said, 'We're losing by six runs and the game is in the
>> eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put
>> him in to bat in the ninth inning.'
>>
>> Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a b road smile,
>> put on a team shirt. His Father watched with a small tear in his eye
>> and warmth in his heart. The boys saw the father's joy at his son
>> being accepted. In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team
>> scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the
>> ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field.
>> Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to
>> be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his
>> father waved to him from the stands. In the bottom of the ninth
>> inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases
>> loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled
>> to be next at bat.
>>
>> At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to
>> win the game? Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew
>> that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how
>> to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.
>>
>> However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing
>> that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in
>> Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay
>> could at least make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung
>> clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to
>> toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung
>> at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher.
>>
>> The game would now be over. The pitcher picked up the soft grounder
>> and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay
>> would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.
>>
>> Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first base man's
>> head, out of reach of all team mates. Everyone from the stands and
>> both team s started yelling, 'Shay, run to first! Run to first!'
>> Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to
>> first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.
>>
>> Eve ryone yelled, 'Run to second, run to second!' Catching his
>> breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling
>> to make it to the base. By the time Shay rounded towards second
>> base, the right fielder had the ball .. the smallest guy on their
>> team who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team. He
>> could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he
>> understood the pitchers intentions so he, too, intentionally threw
>> the ball high and far over the third-base man's head. Shay ran
>> toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled
>> the bases toward home.
>>
>> All were screaming, 'Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay'
>>
>> Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help
>> him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, 'Run
>> to third! Shay, run to third!'
>>
>> As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators,
>> were on their feet screaming, 'Shay, run home! Run home!' Shay ran
>> to ho me, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit
>> the grand slam and won the game for his team.
>>
>> 'That day', said the father softly with tears now rolling down his
>> face, 'the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love
>> and humanity into this world'.
>>
>> Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having
>> never forgotten being the hero and making his father so happy, and
>> coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero  
>> of the day!
>>
>> AND NOW A LITTLE FOOTNOTE TO THIS STORY: We all send thousands of
>> jokes through the e-mail without a second thought, but when it comes
>> to sending messages about life choices, people hesitate. The crude,
>> vulgar, and often obscene pass freely through cyber space, but
>> public discussion about decency is too often suppressed in our
>> schools and workplaces.
>>
>> If you're thinking about forwarding this message, chances are that
>> you're probably sorting out the people in your address book wh o
>> aren't the 'appropriate' ones to receive this type of message. Well,
>> the person who sent you this believes that we all can make a
>> difference. We all have thousands of opportunities every single day
>> to help realize the 'natural order of things.' So many seemingly
>> trivial interactions between two people present us with a choice: Do
>> we pass along a little spark of love and humanity or do we pass up
>> those opportunities and leave the world a little bit colder in the  
>> process?
>>
>> A wise man once said every society is judged by how it treats it's
>> least fortunate amongst them.
>>
>> You now have two choices:
>> 1. Delete
>> 2. Forward
>>
>>
>> May your day, be a Shay Day.
>>
>>
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