NONVIOLENT COMMUNICATION (NVC)

Nonviolent Communication (also called compassionate communication), as developed by Marshall B. Rosenberg, PhD,  is a process which can help people connect compassionately and recognize observations, feelings and needs in themselves and others, and to make requests, with a goal of peaceful resolution of conflicts at a personal and public level, striving to meet the needs of all.  It is hoped that there will be additional practice and study groups and/or workshops about NVC at UUCE.  Details will be announced when specific plans become known.  For questions regarding NVC activities at UUCE you may contact Dick Loescher, 485-1157.

Further information about NVC is available from the Center for Nonviolent Communication (www.cnvc.org), and from the Oregon Network for Compassionate Communication (www.orncc.net).  A current list of NVC activities in the Eugene area can be found by going to www.orncc.net and clicking on Eugene Area, and then clicking on the link in the last sentence which says "online"; or you can go directly to the newsletter at this address: http://pacinfo.com/~mhough/nvc_in_eugene.html .

Core Strategies

Respect, Consideration, and Support
• Begin and end on time.
• Have a strong commitment to attend every session.
• Let the facilitator know when you will not attend.
• Practice respectful listening and sharing of “air time”, with listening to each person’s check in and sharing of the topic without interruption or cross talk (silent empathy).
• The facilitator and group members will call the group back to the guidelines when needed.
• Respect the right to pass.  A person may choose to talk later, or to sit/share in silence.

Empathy and Understanding
• Speak from personal experience and use “I” statements.
• Refrain from giving advice or trying to fix problems (yours or someone else’s) unless advice has been requested.
• Attempt to increase our utilization of nonviolent communication in our interactions within the group and elsewhere in our lives.

Trust and Safety
• Confidentiality:  keep what is shared in the group within the group.
• Follow the meeting format.  It provides a safe and predictable environment.

Learning and Contribution
• Remember we are all learners and teachers.
• Help each other increase our learning and facility with nonviolent communication.
 

Optional Strategies

Respect, Consideration, and Support
• Use a “talking stick or object” to indicate who is talking and when the person is finished.
• Indicate when one is done talking, such as with a gesture or a phrase “I am finished”.
• Have a timekeeper or use a timer to indicate when the allotted time for a person’s sharing is reached.
• Save time for response and dialog after all have shared.
 

There are currently two nonviolent communication practice-study groups at UUCE, which are full, meeting every two weeks from late February through early June 2008.  It is hoped that there will be additional NVC practice-study group opportunities in the future.  Details will be made available when specific plans become known.

On February 2, 2008 there was an all day workshop at UUCE entitled “Connecting Compassionately Introduction To Nonviolent Communication” presented by Gary Baran, a certified trainer with the Center For Nonviolent Communication and former executive director of the Center.  Sixty people attended the workshop, approximately half from UUCE and half from the larger community.

A NVC practice and study group with about 10 participants met for 7 sessions, 2 hours each, from March through May 2007 at UUCE, facilitated by church members Susan Goes and Dick Loescher (assistant).

A NVC workshop was presented at UUCE on November 10 and 11, 2006 by Alan Seid, a certified NVC trainer from the Bellingham, Washington area.  Approximately 120 people attended the evening introductory session on November 10, and 89 attended the all day session on November 11.  About one half the participants were from UUCE and one half from the community.

A NVC workshop was presented at UUCE on November 12 and 13, 2004 by Lisa-Marie DiVincent, a Eugene area therapist and counselor who has extensive experience with NVC.